Imagine any of these moments if Jesus were the other person. How would the situation be different? Would you have the same reaction? I don’t say any of this to point fingers or to make you feel less than. I say this because we have all been there and we can all grow. 

Trusting in God is not always easy, especially when He seems far away. These times of spiritual dryness can be frustrating! I’m sure all Christians can think of a time in their faith when, in a moment of spiritual hair-pulling, they began a prayer with, God, if you really love me, then would you PLEASE…

When he’s got to come to you, you’ll get your miracle. But when you pursue Him, he will fix it all.

An improvement I wanted to make this year is in my prayer time. I tend to pray only before meals or if I am in need of something. That same coffee house vibes I felt earlier, I also wanted to feel from my prayer time with God. That’s when I decided to have coffee shop dates with Jesus. When I pray, I close my eyes and try to picture myself with the Son of God chatting over coffee.

In the old testament, sacrifice is specified in detail. Different sacrifices meant different things and each needed its own unique planning. We sacrificed for God, He gave His Son for us, saints sacrificed and witnessed miracles. Sacrifice is not a thing of the past. It’s a form of worship we CAN still observe.

A couple of years ago I started to write “Dear Future Husband” letters. These letters reflect my own journey of finding love within myself and Jesus, promises and stories I want to one day share with my future husband, and prayers I have for my future husband.

I didn’t make too many close friends in college. Instead, I found myself reestablishing the stronger friendships I had in high school. My attention shifted from: “what can I do to please?” to “is this friendship enriching me?” 

I’m trying to heal. I’m trying to grow. I’m trying to teach myself to unlearn the lies. 

So what’s next?

Well friends, 2022 is a big step for us.

We need to also know that it can be dangerous to over-value our feelings. One of the best nuggets of wisdom I’ve been told is that feelings are not fact. Without going into all of the science behind our emotions, our emotions are a physical reaction (in our head) to what’s happening in life. We have some control at the helm of our emotions, but many times they’re derived out of our past experiences - or even our genetic make-up. Sometimes, our feelings speak lies to us. Our reaction to a situation is, exactly that, a reaction - not reality.

This is such a powerful story that shows the strength that comes from faith. I know for me, being in that moment, it would be SO difficult to say, “I'm willing to lay down my life for Jesus.”

As I researched quickly more into some verses I was met with John 17:24. I began reading the verse but wanted to see even more of the full context of the verse and I was greeted with an overwhelming comfort. 

Matthew 7:7 Ask, and it shall be given to you; seek and you will find; knock, and the door will be open to you. 

Here’s the thing friends, this verse is so common, it is one we learn from a young age, but it is a verse I have found recently I take for granted in my Christian walk. I continued to tell the student that oftentimes I find myself in times when I am distant from God I am missing a key component from Matthew 7:7.

We all need to be more cautious of our actions. We all need to be better at being a TRUE REFLECTION of JESUS! If someone didn’t know Jesus and heard you talking badly about another person, do you think that sounds like Jesus? If you are getting black-out drunk in a bar, cursing like a sailor, and talking poorly of others, do you think that embodies Jesus?

Do you know how big a mustard seed is? It’s usually about 1 to 2 millimeters or 0.039 to 0.079 inches in diameter. That’s tiny. It’s also the smallest seed that can be planted in the ground. Like other seeds, the mustard seed has two options: Grow or die. Jesus said that even faith itty bitty like a mustard seed can do the impossible – that’s because that faith is rooted in Jesus.

My eyes and heart were opened to receive what God has been trying to get through: He knows who I am and always has. To find the answer to my burning question, I look to the women of faith who gave all in worship.

I’ve come to the realization that we serve a God of seasons. Think about it, He could have snapped his fingers and in an instant we would have been saved. But no! He sent a CHILD! A BABY! A child that would grow, learn, preach, serve, THEN, save.

There are seasons in life when I’ve desperately needed to hear from God and seasons where I’ve wanted to make my own decisions. Factor in all the responsibilities of the day and the need for rest, and you’ll also find seasons where my bible would sit on my nightstand without as much as a glance upon it.

See there it is our minds always lean towards the self-esteem validation that we desire. How do you respond in situations when maybe you have wronged someone? Do you justify your decision? Apologize? Or sit in guilt knowing you need to make things right? 

As I continued to pray about it, I was given a new perspective and understanding of why I needed to forgive this person. It wasn’t like they were begging me to forgive them so they can move forward with their life. It was so I can move forward with mine and allow healing to happen.